Ever have one of those mornings when everything that can go wrong, does go wrong? So, I’m using a filter to help me force a smile, cause damn! This morning kicked my ass. But I’m thinking it was to get my attention.
I’ve been aware that I need to break the habit of starting work as soon as I open my eyes. Not even outta bed, & I reach for the phone five days a week to begin my day.
Not this morning! As soon as I reached for my phone, the sound of a dog puking on the carpet made me jump up & fly to the back door to keep from having to clean up more messes. Lovely.
So, with phone in hand, I worked & attended to all the furbabies’ morning needs. It all escalated into a whirlwind of b.s. from there. After about the 5th angry outburst, (cause I’m trying to multitask & failing )I took a deep breath and put down my phone.
I stopped & checked in with myself. My emotional state has been a stormy mess lately. I’m holding myself to standards I can’t maintain. I’m distracted & worrying about things I can’t control: our furbabies’ health (4 out of 8 have needed expensive treatments for separate ailments over the past couple of months), work, money, the holidays, things around the house that need fixing, my car needing work…the list goes on. I’m obsessing & stressing myself out!
I’m not being present in the moment. And when my mind is distracted, I make messes, burn myself on the stove, trip over furniture, drop things, etc. All of this amps up my anger, & I’m having explosive outbursts way too often.
I’ve not been taking care of my own health, as I have the habit of putting everything & everyone else first. I’ve also not been investing in my own healing journey. Both of these are things I can change. My thoughts, my reactions, being present, & using techniques to calm my nerves are all within my control. I need to release what I can’t control & make a plan to handle the things that I can.
I figured I’d share in case anyone else can relate. Let’s stop today & start taking this one moment at a time.
I hope your day is filled with love, light, & peace, sweet souls. Thanks for being here.
Amanda Jewel Warren 