When dealing with depression, my doctor told me to count my wins, even if it was getting out of bed, doing a load of laundry, or going outside for a few minutes. He said it all counts.
That's part of the process of learning to live with bipolar disorder while working through trauma and grief. It's going to be messy and painful and difficult. I know there will be times I feel like I'm getting worse before I get better. But the only way out is through...
Right now, each day I have to tell myself, I will not die today. So, I'm telling you too: Don't die today... Today, let's decide to not give up. Let's not think about tomorrow. Today, let's decide to live.
We still have time to make changes, save our home, and better the world. But time is drawing near to there being no way of going back.
I stood up, turned around, and gasped. Frozen in fear, I watched a black snake slither twelve feet in front of me... I was afraid to move or make a sound... Little did I know that moment was a foreshadowing of things to come.
I asked again to receive my word for the year. After a moment of darkness laced with colors, I saw the outline of a sparkling purple butterfly. This faded as it flew away. Then, the darkness opened up to a wolf standing on the edge of a cliff, mouth open, panting, looking around at the scenery of a desert. This then faded, and it got dark. Just completely black.